180 Shopping List
Body was sorting out her desk and needed to find a piece of scrap paper to write her shopping list on.
“Get a new piece of paper out of the printer and stop wasting time” Brain said.
“I don’t want to” Body answered “when we can use the scrap like the back of an envelope, It’s wastful.”
“You are wasting time” Brain answered.
“What are we going to get?” the Little Red Haired Girl asked.
“Well we need eggs, milk and cheese to start off with and then we will at least have an omelette in the making” Body remembered what Nana had said should times be hard and money was tight.
It brought back a memory of living in a flat miles away from anyone she knew as a new mother with her new born child, when money was indeed in very short supply. A favourite cousin had visited and she had used the last of her eggs, milk and cheese to make him an omelette for lunch for there was nothing else in the fridge to offer him. Her husband was absent as he was most of the time earning very little, but she understood his dreams and loved him with all her heart. Something would come good for them in the future she had felt sure.
Body found a scrap of paper and started to write the list. Eggs, Milk, Cheese, Flour, Sugar.
“Can we have some ice cream?” the child asked.
“We will see, we have to be careful with what we spend and it also depends on whether we use the car otherwise it will melt. Let’s see how much else we have to carry.”
She remembered her cousin leaving after his lunch that day. She had been so pleased to see him, pleased to have some company after the isolation she had found having a new baby can bring, with separation from work colleagues and friends that they no longer saw. They were still free and single and Body wasn’t anymore, nor did she have a car available to her. It was to be expected as life changes and progresses, and people come and go in one’s life.
After her cousin had left, she had put the baby in the pram and with the change she had left in her purse, walked to the shop. Tiredness and pain overwhelmed her, it was like walking waist high in water and the baby just wouldn’t stop crying even though the motion of the pram usually worked to stop it. She kept walking, she needed to get to the shop and get something to eat, her energy levels were too low.
“What did you buy?” the child interrupted her thoughts.
“Potatoes. The shop sold them loose so I bought two potatoes.”
“One potato, two potato, three potato four” the child quoted as she went off to get the shopping bag from the pantry.
Body continued with her list. Where had all that effort, hope and love gone?
“On the credit cards” Brain mocked as it tried to calculate the cost of the food on the list, the car payments and the bills due this month.
“Stop distracting me Brain, we have to eat!”
“Quite” sighed Soul “the rest are just distractions.”
“What the bills and the car?” Brain retorted “We have to live somewhere too.”
“I know” sighed Soul “but there has to be something more than this on our path.”
“It’s what everyone else has to do” Brain argued “We are no different. We need a home, it has bills and we need food.”
“There are many poor souls who don’t have a home” called Spirit. “And often for reasons beyond there control.”
“True” sighed Soul “and I wish it were different.”
“We are all just one credit card payment, one unpaid bill, one default payment on the mortgage or rent away from homelessness, let’s look at how close we have been in the past to losing our home. Let’s look at what is essential here” Brain was ruthless.
“One cigarette. One drink or fix away too from losing a home.” called Spirit “We all make choices.”
“We all have shopping lists” cried Heart “and I am looking forward to having mine back.”
“Oh this will be interesting” Brain surmised getting Body to look at her watch which had stopped working yet again.
“How about the fact that I need love and companionship with someone that stays and is emotionally present in a relationship? How about the hope and joy I have had taken from me? How about truth and integrity from people we’re supposed to be able to trust even when I have transgressed and been honest? What about taking accountability rather than always blaming or manipulating the other? Where is it all? I want them back, not just for me, but for everyone.”
“Oh that was a shorter list than I expected” Brain mocked.
“But twice as important” Heart continued “I could go on. There are many of us feeling lost and lacking in love. I know I am not perfect.”
“Please don’t” Brain was curt.
“It’s not just about food or a roof over our heads. Where has the rest gone? Where is the love for myself, and others, and to each other gone?”
“It’s been taken by others” called Spirit “till we have nothing left to give. We must and have been calling our energy, our power, our self love back to us. The people who have deliberately taken ours from our past are on the list.”
“Which bag shall we take” the child reappeared, “can we take some crumbs for the birds?” as she smiled full of anticipation, full of love, full of sharing. “Ice cream, berries and maybe some chocolate please?” was on her list to share. “What list is yours Spirit? What people do you mean?”
“The list that has reached a different desk. The desk is not here. The desk is in the Universe, in the heavens,”
“With Nana?”
“Possibly. The list has reached Karma’s desk and has reached the top of the pile. It is now under the light.”
“Who’s Karma?” the child asked.
“Think of Karma like an Auntie in the family. An Auntie who knows wrong from right. She doesn’t visit that often but when she does everyone knows her however long she has been absent and she teaches us a good lesson.”
“Like Miss at school? She knows right from wrong. Sometimes she goes away to get married or have a baby and we don’t see her for a while.”
“Yes child” Soul sighed. “She tries to teach you right from wrong. We may not see the benefit of school till much later on one’s life’s path, but it is there without you even ‘knowing’ it. It’s often taken for granted our education.”
“I know how to read and write and count” the child stated.
“But there is so much more child” cried Heart “things they don’t teach you at school.”
“Why not?”
“Because they can’t. They can try to teach you the right things to do but every one’s heart is different. Everyone can chose what they do.”
The child thought for a while, just long enough to decide in the blink of an eye.
“We’ll take this bag then. This one has a lining see, just in case we can afford ice cream.”
“Good idea” Body answered “it will stop the ice cream from melting.”
“It’s insulated” Brain stated “is the word you are looking for. Protects the contents from the sun.”
“Then we can feed the birds on the way or on the way back” she smiled and skipped away to put her shoes on.
“If only life was that simple” Body put her purse in the shopping bag and proceeded to find the house keys.
“You have my insulation” Big voice stated “You have my protection. Trust me.”
© 2025 Jennifer Harris. Free And Alive 555
